It’s been a solid two months since I wrote anything and as you can imagine so much has happened. After two months of a phase called “Delayed Intensification” (yes it is as bad as it sounds) my body decided to completely shut down and it was obvious that the chemo had hit me hard. In December my liver, kidneys, and gallbladder decided to shut down and I was admitted into the hospital yet again for another ten days. I not only became jaundice (that means I literally was yellow) but the stress my body was going through led to my hair falling out all over again. It was then that the doctors began questioning whether or not I had relapsed and I was scheduled to have a biopsy. Thankfully the results showed that I am in remission and it is assumed that my levels are only tanked because nine months of chemo took an extreme toll on my body. After a month without chemo I am currently waiting for my levels to bounce back and to get my gallbladder removed. Today was officially my first day of Maintenance which means that I have eighteen months of everyday oral chemo, steroids for five days each month, a lumbar puncture once a month, and IV chemo once a month. Although my body still hates me, I am excited to begin to slowly working my way up to becoming my old self.
Mentally I am exhausted. My cancer is becoming normal and I have become accustomed to the constant hospital visits that take all day. Throughout these past two months I have had many highs and many lows. While making two more cancer friends I have also lost one of my most treasured. I guess that just comes with life on the cancer floor but it still breaks my heart each time a new angel gains their wings. I constantly struggle with the idea that I am one of the lucky individuals who is responding to treatment while so many others are fighting desperately to stay alive. It bring up the question “why me?” I have had twenty-two years of life lived while there are younger patients who will never get the chance to experience all that I have. I just want everyone to recognize how lucky they are to be alive and learn to fully appreciate each experience they are able to go through.
PL&FC
RIP Natalia
Cancer is Stupid 
You are incredible my Katie! I love you to the moon and back and I know I’ve said it many times… I look up to you! God hs chosen you to help make a difference. Your heart and spirit is contagious and this is what our world needs! Stay strong and I can’t wait to laugh with you soon and see your beautiful smile become bigger and bigger each day.
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I am praying for you. Hmmm, you are exactly where many survivors are, even war heroes. Katie I hope you focus on those who will follow your happiness and be with you today with your gift of life, and perhaps you will see how others now live on in or rather through your eyes as you remember them. You are treasure. Someday everyone will find amazing peace. What you or I think is important as far as time, may not be. Follow your heart. Your always fan.
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Katie glad to hear things are at least moving in a positive direction. You are always in our prayers. The news of Natalia this week was heart breaking once again for us. Your fight, progress and outlook help keep us in the fight of finding the cure for this crap!!! Stay strong, know we are thinking of you often!!!!!
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Gpa here-
Just before I go to sleep each evening I ask myself, “Did I hurt anyone, did I in small way make the world slightly better, and did I have a good time?”
If I can answer yes and I don’t wake up the next morning I’m OK with that. I’ve been doing this for 50 years.
Life is what we make of it regardless of our circumstances.
PL&FC
Love,
Gpa
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This was the BEST news so far this year!!! We keep praying for you, your family & your entire medical team. YOU GO GIRL! We feel so blessed that you and Evanthia have the wonderful friendship that helps keep you both strong! Love you and hope to meet you some day soon!!
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Hello Katie
I was lucky enough to meet your dad this week. Your strength, attitude and love are part of what he travels with and shares. How lucky he is to have the family he has and the daughter he has in you. I read your posts and can only share that although I know you only through your father and through what you have written, you will be in my daily family prayers.
With appreciation, admiration and affection,
Louis
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Glad you are back Katie! And in remission too. We’ll continue to follow your blog with hopes and prayers and best wishes for you. You are blessed with great heart and a great family which not everyone has.
Soldier on….
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